SABO SEZ: The Myth of Mentorship
By Walter Sabo
a.k.a. Walter Sterling, Host
WPHT, Philadelphia, “Walter Sterling Every Damn Night”
TMN syndicated, “Sterling on Sunday”
Advice columns blanketing sites like LinkedIn, the Skimm, and Forbes 2.0 – aimed at recent graduates – encourage their readers to seek and bond with an at-work mentor. After years of skimming “5 bullet” articles, I have reached the tipping point and I’m not going to take it anymore: Seeking a mentor as a career strategy is horrible advice. Just horrible.
Here’s what I experienced. My first job out of Syracuse University was at RKO Radio in Manhattan. An FM. OMG. The job was promotional support and a weekend talk show. After that, NBC local, ABC network, NBC corporate, ABC corporate… all before I was 30. No mentor.
Seek-a-mentor articles are usually aimed at women. It is even worse advice for women. Here’s why:
1. No one wants to be your mentor out of kindness and heavenly points. They only want to be your mentor if you are wired to someone powerful. Someone you can tell how wonderful they are to you
2. Your mentor’s reputation becomes yours! If your mentor is thought a jerk or is fired out of general hatred, you will be fired pretty soon. At NBC, the perception was that NBC CEO Fred Silverman was my mentor. I was terminated about a week after Fred left the building. The reason I was given by my direct report was, “You were too closely associated with Fred.” Fact: I spoke to Fred once during my three-year NBC tenure. (Much later Fred and I became close friends and how lucky I was!)
3. The mentee’s expectations are always too broad. Each of us is good at one or two skills. “mentor” implies a much wider menu of advice than is realistic.
4. One day, the mentor will be proven wrong on a key issue and the mentee will be very confused.
Best advice ever: You have no friends at work. Co-workers, yes. Work-wife? Work-husband? No, no, no!
The greatest gift you can give a co-worker is a request for advice. Each co-worker has strengths. Identify those strengths and tap into those. One request of a colleague is flattering. Ten requests for help is a sign of weakness and you will be eaten.
In any business, especially “glamour” businesses, your goal is to not be eaten by people jealous of you. You could be eaten for any reason because the jobs are sparse and security is mercurial.
Obviously, a job is a job. It is not a social club. Early in a person’s work life, it is tempting to make the workplace a surrogate family. That could get you eaten. Do your job. Go home.
Walter Sabo has been a C-Suite action partner for companies such as SiriusXM, Hearst, Press Broadcasting, Gannett, RKO General, and many other leading media outlets. His company, HITVIEWS, in 2007, was the first to identify and monetize video influencers. His nightly show “Walter Sterling Every Damn Night” is heard on WPHT, Philadelphia. His syndicated show, “Sterling On Sunday,” from Talk Media Network, airs 10:00 pm-1:00 am ET, and is now in its 10th year of success. He can be reached by email at sabowalter@gmail.com.
program designed specifically to support the growth and evolution of women on-the-air. The “Behind The Mic Mentorship” program is a year-long experience exclusively for female personalities that have been in an on-air position for at least three to five years in local or national radio programming and have demonstrated a desire to grow their on-air career. The selected mentee will receive personalized conversations and advice from a wide range of industry professionals including two of radio’s top stars – national radio and television personality and Gracie Award winner Elaina D. Smith of “Nights with Elaina,” and WLTW, New York morning personality Christine Nagy. The mentorship is available to one female on-air personality from any U.S. based music format.