Tag: Monday Memo

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Worst Promo I Hear Most Often?

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

im“If you missed Biff & Bev in-the-Morning, you missed…”  It’s a donut: produced open and close, with an aircheck clip in the middle.

— I don’t think I have ever heard such a promo that caused me remorse for missing the show being touted. Often the clip makes the personalities sound self-amused.

— The listener can’t act on this message. This morning’s Biff & Bev show is gone, and don’t count on anyone clicking-as-many-times-as-necessary to find it on the station website.

— You send diary keepers a dangerous subliminal message: that they DIDN’T listen. Heck, we want to fool them into thinking they did listen!

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Instead:

— Talk about the NEXT show.

— Use “you” and/or “your” as-early-as-possible in copy; and “and your calls!” near the end.

— Offer a benefit statement, something listeners will realize from listening, i.e., what they’ll take-away from hearing tomorrow’s guest, what they can call-in-and-win, anticipated topics.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Don’t Say Goodbye

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

If you’re hosting a weekend ask-the-expert show to attract new clients and customers, DON’T say goodbye at the end of your show.

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Instead, tell ‘em: “THAT’S IT FOR TODAY’S RADIO SHOW. IF YOU MISSED ANY OF IT, YOU CAN LISTEN AT YOUR CONVENIENCE OR DOWNLOAD IT FROM [describe how to find on-demand page on station web site; and/or “ON YOUR FAVORITE PODCAST PLATFORM”]. AND WE’RE ALWAYS AVAILABLE AT [your business’ web site address]. AND WE’LL TAKE YOUR CALL ANYTIME, AT OUR [store, office, etc.], [phone number, nice-and-slow]. OR EMAIL ME AT [address, something memorable, i.e., AskAndy@yourURL.com].

And ICYMI, there’s more guidance from a previous TALKERS issue here.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Talking About Abortion

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imMany Americans have been, in the two years since the Supreme Court punted the issue down to the states. For suburban women voters in swing states, it is – by far – the number one issue, per a Wall Street Journal poll. It tipped 2022 midterms and 2023 elections and swung other elections in battleground states.

As the 2024 vote looms, your reporting will likely be criticized, by both sides; and experience recommends a useful posture when listeners question your coverage and threaten to shun your advertisers.

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No local radio market enjoys – or suffers – more politically outspoken listeners than Washington DC. I programmed all-news WTOP there for seven years in the 80s and 90s. Even then – with Roe’ the law of the land – this was a white-hot issue.

The quickest way we could make EVERYONE angry was by reporting crowd estimates for abortion rallies. Half the callers accused us of inflating the numbers, the other half said we low-balled it.

Here, from my files, are an actual complaint letter, and our standard reply.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Are You Ready?

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imNext month, as the school year begins in so many places, the listeners that local retailers want as customers transition back to their “normal” routines. Their tempo changes and builds to a holiday season climax. And we – and our advertisers – want to be their soundtrack.

WHO ARE “they?” Last week’s column described a useful exercise that fleshes-them-out and tees-up important imaging and content discussions worth having pre-Labor Day.

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Off-air promotion (remember that?) merely says give-us-a-try. When they do, does what they hear deliver? And even with scant (or no) off-air promotion, much of what you can do to become more habit-forming costs nothing. As consultants do, I’m talking about “the fundamentals,” the blocking-and-tackling stuff.

Here’s the checklist of things you want to be listening for right now.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: WHO ARE You Talking To?

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imWe – inside-the-box – live and breathe radio. Listeners have their hands full just living and breathing. Their day is time crunched and financially challenging, and we want to be its soundtrack.

But listening is free, unlike umpteen other purchase decisions they agonize. So, what’s high stakes to us is low stakes to them. We only matter if we matter, and we’ve never had so much audio competition. Accordingly, this exercise, which has been helpful at stations I work with:

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Describe the listener your station targets. Then ask other staffers.

— Is everyone profiling the same person?

— Does your programming content address their needs and wants?

— Is station imaging about the station? Or their needs and wants?

— Do commercials offer solutions? Are you missing categories?

Well worth the investment in conference room pizza.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: “Cart This Up”

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

Talk host: Hot-key this SFX: stopwatch – TV’s iconic “60 Minutes” sound – 60 seconds of tick-tick-tick, then some sort of time’s-up sound. Play it underneath callers who vehemently disagree with you, or each other.

By giving them uninterrupted time, you will seem more welcoming than rude controlling caricature hosts. (The most compelling shows are those that sound nearly-out-of-control.)

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If the caller’s beef is with you, you’ll likely “win,” because even the most PO’d caller can’t fill the allotted :60.

Another SFX: tap dancing. Play this underneath callers or sound bites of newsmakers who sound like they’re on-the-spot… or under interviews that sound humorously all spin.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Behold the Radio Unicorn!

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imGot young local radio news talent? CONGRATULATIONS, for five reasons:

1. They’re young, which our 100-year-old medium NEEDS.
2. Streaming and satellite competitors don’t do local.
3. Radio is still #1 in-car. And in-home again, via smart speakers.
4. As listeners wonder “What NEXT?” news has their back.
5. Talent is acquired. Hire attitude, train skills.

Just DOING local news makes you special, especially if your AM/FM competitors don’t. Six tips for taking it to the next level, and making your station more habit forming:

— Make this hour’s newscast sound different than last hour’s. A particularly clever turn-of-phrase can come back to haunt you the second time a listener hears that version. The little voice in their head says, “I already heard that.”
— Lead with the latest. Avoid telling the story in chronological order. Is there some detail that can top this hour’s version? “A third shift of state troopers has joined the search for little Sarah Johnson…”
— Write as though you were telling the listener face-to-face. The police posted: “Anyone who has seen a car matching that description is asked to contact the police.” Rewrite to say, “If you see that car, call the police.”

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— Less is more. Long sentences can make it difficult for the listener to follow the story and understand the information. Emulate your network’s writing style. Write for the ear. Avoid using too many adjectives and adverbs.
— But don’t leave out verbs! “The woman’s husband arrested the wounded man taken to the hospital.” Huh?
— Highly recommended: “Writing Broadcast News Shorter, Sharper, Stronger” by Mervin Block (expensive on Amazon, FREE on Google Books).

Time Spent Listening is still the ballgame. Specifically, we want to add occasions of tune-in, which is easier than extending duration-per-occasion. Translation: There is very little we can do to keep someone in a parked car with the key on Accessories.

So be known for knowing. Benefit-laden imaging will earn you the information reputation that keeps listeners coming back again and again, “for a quick update.” And user-friendly copy points will be more effective than the boastful station-centric way many news promos sound.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Double-Check Baseball Sponsors’ In-Game Copy

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

Spots that crow “Baseball is back!” were real welcome in April… and sound real OLD by now.Even if that’s not a copy point, can you freshen the client’s pitch? Simply asking sends-the-message that you’re on-the-ball… and you didn’t wander away once the deal closed.

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And buy ‘em some peanuts and Cracker Jack. Every time we’ve taken advertisers up to the radio booth in a Major League Baseball park, they felt like VIPs. Do selfies with the announce team and that breathtaking view in the background, and they’ll show EVERYONE.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and  “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: WHY Are You Podcasting?

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imBecause you can? Because you aren’t doing AM/FM radio? Because you are on radio, but can’t-do-there what you can-do podcasting? Because you are making money podcasting?

Podcasters I help must first survive a conversation about WHY. “It’s a success…if…” WHAT?

Wired magazine co-founder Kevin Kelly reckons that “a creator, such as an artist, musician, photographer, craftsperson, performer, animator, designer, video maker, or author – in other words, anyone producing works of art – needs to acquire only 1,000 true fans to make a living.”

Devour these four pages he wrote – a genuine whack-on-the-side-of-the-head – and the structure for my coaching: http://getonthenet.com/1000TrueFans.pdf

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What you read there may change how you approach the podcast you’re doing… or nudge you into podcasting if you don’t. As does the Edison Research 2024 Infinite Dial survey. Here’s that download, and a cautionary video from TALKERS publisher Michael Harrison: http://getonthenet.com/podcasting.html

Next Monday is Memorial Day here in the USA, so I’ll be back here on “…the third of June.” If you work mornings, this is my last column you will see before your show that day, so make a note in your bumper file: Bobbie Gentry, “Ode to Billy Joe.”

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: A.I. Cannot Do This Commercial

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imActor Hugh Grant’s Tweet called it “The destruction of the human experience. Courtesy of Silicon Valley.” He was reacting to Apple’s TV commercial depicting a hydraulic press crushing a piano, a record player, paint, books, cameras, and other creative tools Artificial Intelligence emulates, via the new iPad Pro.

With many now fearful that technology will obsolete their jobs, Apple yanked the spot: “We missed the mark with this video and we’re sorry.”

Following my recent column cautioning how ChatGPT-generated ads can be cliché-riddled, several TALKERS readers have sent me even more of the cringe-worthy catch-phrases (“And much more!”) that reduce too many ads to blah-blah-blah.

Various vendors are offering – and, increasingly, stations are using – Artificial Intelligence apps to script, and even voice, commercials. It’s a time-saver alright, but is the output compelling?

In some cases, there’s a fill-in-the-blanks form. Other apps crawl the prospect’s website for copy points. When I’m given demonstrations, I suggest a business I’m familiar with. And I’ve yet to hear a script that captures what makes the business special.

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For one such demo,’ I chose a restaurant we frequent often, here on Block Island. The copy generated was painfully generic. So – to make the point – I went old-school, using the method that has consistently produced results for client stations and in my freelance work.

My video describing the process “Radio Advertising, In Their Own Words” includes several examples… and here’s another.

The AI robot cannot possibly feel-the-feel anyone who has dined there knows… and can’t spot this opportunity: The chef himself is a story, as entertained customers discover: http://getonthenet.com/TheBarn-BrianHebert-1.mp3

And here’s The Free Prize Inside: People tell advertisers who appear in their spots, “I heard you on the radio!”

More work than simply plugging-into an AI app? You bet. The interview from which I excerpted the sound bites you’ll hear took all of five minutes, and I voiced and assembled the spot in under half an hour.

Everything we do is storytelling.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and  “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Cliché Alert!

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imRatings – and advertisers’ results – reward what listeners remember, what sticks-out, not clichés that blend-in. So, avoid blah-blah-blah such as…

“on tap for…”

Instead of “…and more sunshine on tap for Sunday,” say “…and more sunshine Sunday!” 

“The best _____ around” or “the best _____ in town.”

Commercial copy Styrofoam. “The best wings?” Say WHY, in a way that makes the listener salivate.

“conveniently located”

Zzzz… 

“weaponized”

The word itself has been weaponized. It’s talking-about-talking.

“spot-on”

Translation: What you expressed affirms my predisposition. Talk radio is more interesting, and habit-forming, when sparks fly. So, pique curiosity. Have your screener move callers who disagree to the head of the line.

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“Too clever by half.”

Measured how? Not self-explanatory, this is distracting. And it always sounds condescending. 

“all-important”

As in “let’s check that all-important forecast,” often heard when weather is severe or changing quickly. Rookie stuff. If it’s important, get right to it.

“In this day and age…”

‘Makes you sound like an immigrant from the 20th Century, speaking with an accent. 

“THAT’S the $64,000 question.”

From a TV show in the 1950s, when $64K was big money. 

“shuttered.”

If something closed, say “closed.”  Listeners don’t say “shuttered” in conversation…which is where we want to end up.

“unmitigated gall”

“in any way, shape, or form”

And on THAT note…kidding…

“Period, full-stop.”

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: It’s Artificial Intelligence

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imI asked ChatGPT: “Vendors are now offering radio stations a service that delivers advertising commercial copy generated by AI. Because AI draws from what’s already been done, this risks sound-alike scripts. Is there a list of commercial clichés users should instruct AI to exclude?”

Instantly, the robot replied: “While there isn’t a definitive list of commercial clichés, as they can vary depending on industry, audience, and cultural context, here are some common examples to consider instructing AI to avoid:

1. Don’t miss out!

2. Limited time offer!

3. One-of-a-kind deal!

4. Act now!

5. For a limited time only!

6. Unbeatable prices!

7. Revolutionary product!

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8. Best in class!

9. Cutting-edge technology!

10. Guaranteed satisfaction!

11. Change your life today!

12. Once in a lifetime opportunity!

13. Hurry, while supplies last!

14. Get yours today!

15. New and improved!

These are just a few examples, and there are many more clichés that could be included in such a list. It’s also important to consider the specific audience and context when identifying and excluding cliches from AI-generated advertising commercial copy.”

Skynet has become self-aware. 

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins,” and  “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: The Irresistible Offer

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imHaving written thousands of commercials and promos, I’ve become a copy connoisseur. And, admittedly, a tough grader when it comes to delivery. Sell me and you’re good.

So, all four flight attendants caught my ear as I flew to/from a radio conference in Hawaii. The pitch came toward the end of 10+ hours each way nonstop Boston/Honolulu; and aboard the quick hops to/from Kauai.

They sounded neither sing-songy, as though they were reading; nor falsely enthusiastic. That alone impressed me. Thirty years ago, I scripted such announcements – and coached flight attendants – when I programmed 3 live USA Today Sky Radio channels aboard Delta, United, and Northwest Airlines. Back to the future…

They were hawking the Hawaiian Airlines Mastercard, which, already having a wallet full of plastic, I didn’t need. Each dollar spent earns a Hawaiian Mile (double miles for restaurant purchases), which would be tempting if I wanted to visit again. But I wasn’t sold… yet. I had been to Hawaii once before, on vacation, and only went this second time for business. Travelogue here recently explains that we East Coasters have quicker paths to paradise.

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Typically, these affinity cards come with a signing bonus. Another one I have awarded 20,000 points if I used it to make at least $1,000 in purchases within the first 90 days. So, I smiled when these flight attendants emphasized that – using the promo code on applications they were handing out – I could quickly earn 80,000 miles, a bonus “you won’t see if you sign-up online.”

And as an announcement aficionado, I noted how all four recited this line verbatim: Unlike other cards that ask $1,000 or more purchases to qualify, “Just buy a cup of coffee or a pack of gum, and you’ve got 80,000 Hawaiian Miles.”

And they explained that 80K was enough for a free round trip from Boston or New York to Honolulu, or TWO round trips from a West Coast airport… DARN tempting… if I ever want to go back to Hawaii. Still not sold.

The clincher? I can also use those miles on JetBlue, which services my home airport, Providence, and flies to the Bahamas. SOLD. And my first purchase was indeed for a cup of coffee, and I did get the 80,000 miles. So, this is my restaurant card now.

Every time I’ve told this story in a client station sales meeting, at least one rep says, “Spell that all out again?” and starts writing. Successful sellers anticipate and address objections as well as that inflight announcement. Ditto commercial copy you craft for local retailers. Welcome aboard.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: April Fool!

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imPick a day, any day. At least one news item will have the little voice in your head hollering “TELL me you’re kidding!” After recent headlines, and as various plots thicken, that little voice might need a lozenge.

In olden times, DJs’ and hosts’ April 1 on-air shenanigans would amuse and/or upset listeners. Some of these gags cost jesters their jobs. Expect less of that today, as the local talent ranks have thinned. Maybe A.I. DJs will come up with something.

As cutbacks were cascading on April 1, 2008, my gallows humor headline was: “Farid himself now voice-tracking True Oldies, using on-air name Fred Soulman, as staff cuts force management on-air. The Mystery Oldie-of-the-Day winner gets 1,000 shares of Citadel stock or $1,000 cash, whichever is less. APRIL FOOL!”

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Back to the future: Many surviving jocks and talkers and newscasters have something in common, what consultants call “word economy.” It’s never been more important than during these dizzying days, but it’s nothing new. All along, those who took only 7 seconds to make a point seemed to be more successful than those who took 17 seconds. When I was a DJ, I stole a line from WABC’s Dan Ingram, who intro’d the Elton John song, “Someone Shaved My Wife Tonight.”

If you’re spinning the hits, streams are spinning more of ‘em, without eight-unit stopsets. So keep it moving. Doing news? Listeners are wondering “What NEXT?” and if you’re telling them, succinctly, they’ll find you helpful and habit-forming. Hosting a talk show? Understand that every other media experience listeners favor is interactive. Busy caller traffic (something local advertisers notice) lets you own topic du jour.

And whether you’re a DJ, news person, or host: Every…single…minute…someone just got in the car. Reset frequently-enough that they’re up-to-speed.

But don’t take my word for it. Being April Fool’s Day, I’ll let these funsters (some immortal) demonstrate this word economy I preach:

“I saw a bank that said ‘24-hour banking,’ but I don’t have that much time.”

— Comedian Steven Wright, my Block Island neighbor

“When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.”

— Rodney Dangerfield

“I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor’s office was full of portraits by Picasso.”

— Rita Rudner

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.”

— Groucho Marx

“I hate housework. You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later, you have to start all over again.”

— Joan Rivers

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Remember “The Book?”

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imBefore the bound copy arrived – at which point all work stopped – Arbitron would send “Advances.” Even those topline numbers ground things to a halt, and had some PDs doing cartwheels, others out on the ledge. ‘Seems quaint now.

Back to the future: Measurement is continuous in bigger markets; and Nielsen Audio surveys other rated markets twice a year, and that Spring 2024 survey begins Thursday. But don’t tense-up. Nothing changes the day the survey begins. Radio listening is habit, earned before the sample is polled.

So even if your station doesn’t subscribe, figure that we’re all in Continuous Measurement mode, and do the 5 things that play the ratings game by its rules:

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1. Promote off-air, reminding existing listeners to keep coming back; and asking those who don’t to give you a try. It’s common for stations that do still promote off-air to show billboards and run TV spots JUST as “The Book” begins. Smart stations shopped smarter, when media were on-sale in January, inviting the sampling then that could be habit by now.

2. Keep ‘em listening longer each time. Just a few more minutes could earn another Quarter Hour of listening credit, although there’s little we can do to keep someone sitting still in a parked car. So…

3. Get ‘em back more times per day (“vertical maintenance” in consultant-speak); and…

4. Get ‘em back more days per week (“horizontal maintenance”); and…

5. Be more memorable, since ratings are a memory test. It is well-worth every effort to be as helpful and relevant and self-explanatory as possible. Tip: “You” and “your” are magic words. And be considerate. Listeners are mentally busy. Boil-it-down.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn. 

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Happy Campers

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imFor spring break this year, Sarah and I revisited Sandals Grand Bahamian all-inclusive resort – NOT inexpensive, and very worth it. We’ve already booked same-week-next-year, and we think we know who we’ll see there then.

Among those we chatted-up at beach bars: Owner of a HVAC service company in Iowa. He arrived ahead of 16 employees and +ones (“the other 16 are back there keepin’ the heat on”). And get this: He said that, for some, it’s their first airplane travel. And they land in Nassau! WHAT a boss, eh?

Another business owner we met topped that! He had 38 inbound next-day for a long weekend. To qualify for this “President’s Club” trip, those 19 reps each moved a million dollars of product in 2023.

“Selling what?” I had to ask. “All the things nobody wants to buy,” he quipped. His company is a rack jobber, meaning it has agreements with retailers to display and sell products in-store. Think cigarette lighters and the thousand other items you see at gas stations and convenience stores.

Going right into Larry King mode, I learned about those sunglasses that retail for $19.99. He buys ‘em by the palette, 19 cents each. And when I asked “What was HOT 2 years ago, and is NOT now?” he replied, without hesitation, “masks.”

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He caught my ear when he used the term “liberal” to describe regions. In talk radio, that’s a political term. But the way he used it reflects Michael Jordan’s famous quote, “Republicans buy sneakers, too.” Like politics, commerce is regionalized. And he spoke in practical terms: Phone charger cords sold in the northeast are predominantly iPhone-compatible. “Get much-south-of New York,” and Android cords are also popular.

Contributing to inflation: Pre-pandemic, the usual business model was that the store paid for what his company delivered. Some clients were big-enough to change that, to paying-upon-SALE, which bar codes enable. So, the rack jobber is on-the-hook for “inventory shrinkage” (shoplifting and pilferage). But the arm-wrestling continues… and at least 19 reps are winning.

Heading for our final-night-there dinner, we passed the President’s Club reception in a VIP area; and next morning at breakfast, we spotted President’s Club T-shirts. We expect to see more next year, because, as the boss winked, “those wives want to come back!” and they tend to be supportive of long workdays in the meantime. 😉

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of  “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: MAKE MONEY on YouTube

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imSell a local advertiser a promotion – a contest which awards a major prize from the advertiser’s inventory – to the winner who creates the best commercial for the advertiser.

Simplify the entry process by simply making “Send us your YouTube link” the means-of-entry. Then, you can embed finalists’ YouTube players on a-page-of-entries, (sponsored by the advertiser). And you can use the YouTube hit count to determine the winner. Sure, contestants will hype-the-clicks. The bigger the numbers, the better.

im

The Free Prize Inside: You don’t just expose advertiser and contest to YOUR cume. You’re showing it to YouTube’s cume! So, pack those keywords.

And/or: Invite listeners to do a commercial for the station!

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: The Local Radio Advantage, Part 3

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imIt’s not your imagination. The world has gone daffy. The USA is all-but boots-on-the-ground in rough neighborhoods around the world. Weather is getting even wackier. The next gun nut could open fire, at any moment, anywhere. 2024 campaign? It’s a long way to November. And even in this rebounding economy, supermarket prices still hit-home… if you can get there.

Here in Southern New England that could take up to an hour longer, as tens of thousands are inconvenienced every day, and will be for months – possibly two years we’re told – after an abrupt bridge closure along Interstate 195. Your daily commute is torture if you live here; and an unpleasant surprise awaits when you head to Cape Cod this summer, or if you’re just passing through this intersection where I-195 joins Maine-to-Miami I-95, the main artery through the most densely populated parts of the USA.

The good news for listeners is that serious structural defects were spotted BEFORE a deadly bridge collapse like we’ve seen in Minnesota and Pennsylvania and elsewhere in recent years. The good news for local media is that information changes throughout the day, and day-to-day, as the Department of Transportation continuously modifies lane merges and detours to cope. If you’re driving, you can’t NOT listen.

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Presume that listeners are wondering “What NEXT???” If your station is known-for-knowing, listeners will keep coming back for more. Last week and the week before here, we demonstrated simple tweaks that make local news copy instantly more and helpful and relevant and understandable. This week: setting an expectation and delivering. Two tips:

Invite overtly. Try this imaging statement that has proven effective for setting a listening appointment to on-hour newscasts: “SO much is changing, SO quickly now. Stay close to the news.” Example: If you’re an affiliate, call it “a quick FOX News update, every half hour, throughout your busy day.” Doing so empowers the customers our local advertisers want pulling into the parking lot.

Then, make it sound different than last hour. Advance the story.

Example: news that “The New York Times is buying Wordle” broke in afternoon drive.

Next morning, same copy, word-for-word.

Better next-morning lead: “Wordle will remain free… for now.”

Avoid the listener thinking, “You already told me that,” by leading with a different aspect than last time. Every effort you make to sound fresh is well worth it.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: The Local Radio Advantage, Part 2

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imRadio programming is like any business. Our best prospects are existing customers (getting people already listening to listen more often). And – without spending a dime on outside promotion – we can if the station is known-for-knowing. Set the expectation that we have listeners’ backs and optimize the information we deliver.

Last week’s column was Part 1 of this three-part series, demonstrating a simple tweak for making source material more relevant and useful. This week, more addition-by-subtraction: “A-words” to avoid; and Magic Words to use every chance you get.

“Anyone,” and “asked,” and “announced” are red flags. These words scream press release.

Instead-of: “Anyone who has seen a car matching that description is asked to contact the police.”

Say: “If you see that car, call the police.”

Instead of: “Anyone who feels discriminated-against because…”

Say: “If you feel discriminated-against because…”

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“Anyone” (or “those,” both third-person) is someone else. Second-person Magic Words “you” and “your” talk to me, the listener. And instead of telling me THAT something-was-announced, explain WHAT, and what-it-means-to-me:

Example: “Jefferson County has joined Clearfield, Elk and 18 other Pennsylvania counties in the Law Enforcement Treatment Initiative. The initiative is a law enforcement-led collaborative program which seeks to direct those who suffer from substance abuse disorders into helpful treatment services.”

Re-write: “If you live in Jefferson County and you or someone you know are struggling with substance abuse, you can now ask police to connect you with a treatment program without being arrested or prosecuted…”

Next week here: THE #1 way to keep listeners coming back for more…

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: The Local Radio Advantage

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imIf you’re a news/talk station, don’t assume that you own “news radio” in your market. Imaging is important, but it merely talks-the-talk. You walk-the-walk with local news copy that delivers what solid commercial copy does: benefits. Just doing local news makes you special. But do listeners simply hear a station voice… reading something? Are you merely… accurate? Or do you deliver “take-home pay,” unwrapping the story to tell the listener something useful?

In many homes, there are now fewer radios than smart speakers. And nobody has ever said: “Alexa, please play six commercials.” But she can play millions of songs. So do streams and YouTube.

What can make a music station different from all those other audio choices is the way you help folks cope, how relevant and empathetic you are, how you sound like you have-their-back as day-to-day news has them wondering “What NEXT?”

And boosting tune-in exposes your advertisers better. So, Time Spent Listening is still the ballgame. Specifically, you need to add occasions of tune-in, and this week’s column begins a three-part series of news copy coaching tips that can help bring listeners back more often.

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Simply rewriting source material can make a huge difference. Press releases torture the ear. They’re formal, and prone to jargon and spin (especially from politicians). When they’re from the police, they’re written in cop-speak. And most press releases are written inside-out, emphasizing a process, rather than the consequence to listeners.

Process example: “At Thursday’s work session of the Springfield City Council, a decision was made to move forward with Community Days this year. The annual Community Days celebration is scheduled for June 16 and 17th. Council members made sure the Community Days funds will be handled by an independent accountant. Councilwoman Sharon Grant said…”

Re-write to lead with consequence: “The annual Springfield Community Days celebration will be June 16th and 17th. After last year’s controversy, Council members made sure the Community Days funds will be handled by an independent accountant. At Thursday’s session, Councilwoman Sharon Grant said…”

That simple tweak is well-worth the minimal effort. Listeners are mentally busy. Remove “Styrofoam words.”  Example: “State Police say they are investigating a possible case of child endangerment after a seven-month-old child was treated for severe injuries.”

Simply delete “say they.”

Next week: Ripped from the headlines… 

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Milk It

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imIf last week’s column didn’t out me as an utter Smerconish fan-boy, this week’s will. Find his 2/10 CNN show online. It may be the best hour of cable news Talk TV I’ve ever seen; and having hosted several hundred myself, I don’t say so casually.

After Special Counsel Robert K. Hur’s report on President Biden’s mishandling of classified material characterized him as a “sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory,” Michael’s poll asked: “Should Jill Biden suggest to her husband that he not seek re-election?”

50,504 votes (not a misprint): 63.85% Yes, 36.15% No.

Guest James Carville quipped that “Today is the youngest you’ll ever be for the rest of your life;” and he noted that LBJ didn’t drop out of the 1968 race until March.

Meanwhile, the D.C. Circuit Court of Appeals rejects Donald Trump’s claim of immunity from prosecution for the potential crimes tied to trying to stay in office despite losing the election…AND polls consistently demonstrate that most Americans don’t want a Biden-Trump rematch in 2024. Undaunted, Nikki Haley asks “do we really want two 80-year-olds” to be the choice?

With all due respect to Rush Limbaugh for leading the vaunted “Talk Radio Revolution” back then, this format’s golden age is NOW. We are in the suspense business. Milk it.

TALKERS publisher Michael Harrison asks, “Does the current crop of hosts, trained to preach to their target audience choirs, have the skill and balls to take advantage of the frustrated – even desperate – mood of the greater American public outside their narrow-minded core followers? And will their bosses allow them to even try?”

While I share his concern, I am advising news/talk stations that the “news” component is MUCH more tactically opportune than the “talk” – even for FOX News Radio affiliates which program major syndicated political hosts. ABC and CBS newscasts are also big assets, appointment listening if we promote overtly.

Specific goal: Add occasions-of-tune-in. How: “With SO much changing SO quickly now, stay close to the news. Check-in for a quick [name of network] update, every half hour…here. [dial positions, call letters].”

Local news people: This tactic will better expose your work too. Emulate your network’s writing style, latest-aspect-first, short sentences, use sound, and sound different than last hour.

Hosts: LISTEN. If callers barely let you get a word in edgewise, you’re playing this just right.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “The Local Radio Advantage: Your 4-Week Tune-In Tune-Up,” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins”and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Calculating Taylor Swift

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imNow that every single thing is a political argument, the angry social media conversation about Taylor Swift is unsurprising. And with the Super Bowl looming, the decibel level amps-up.

So, kudos to SiriusXM and CNN host Michael Smerconish. I’ve previously cited him here as technique worth emulating when it comes to:

– Polling the audience on an ongoing basis (a sponsored feature on smart radio stations)
– Leveraging social media to give audience ownership of the show; and
– Genuine curiosity. His centrist approach earns him scorn from both sides in this Cold Civil War we’re living through. I can relate. When I managed WTOP, Washington, the quickest way to make the phone explode was to announce a crowd estimate for an abortion rally. Both sides jammed the lines to damn the number.

This preposterous Swift kerfuffle had been all heat until Smerconish shed light on it this past weekend. Noting rumors shared by FOX News that she would photobomb the Super Bowl with a Joe Biden endorsement, his poll question was “Could Taylor Swift determine the outcome of the presidential election?”

im

Just now, you answered that question in your own mind. But – for our purposes – the more useful approach is to consider information Smerconish curated unfiltered by personal politics:

– Swift has 279 million Instagram followers
– She has (so far) sold 4.35 million pricey tickets for The Eras Tour. Its “record-shattering revenue” (so far) is $1 billion+
– $200 million (so far) in tour merchandise. Her gray $45 T-shirt is now sold-out in all but 3XL and 4XL.
– 26 billion+ Spotify streams in 2023.
– SSRS polling: 59% of USA adults identify as Swift fans, 63% of women; and her fans are evenly divided 50/50 between Democrat or Dem-leaning and Republican or GOP-leaning.
– On her urging, several hundred thousand Americans younger than 25 have registered to vote.

Add it all up? “Taylor knows your social media interactions, where you saw her on tour, how much merch’ you’ve bought from her website, she knows the size of your T-shirt, the number of downloads you’ve made. We’re embarking on an election cycle which will be (a) the most expensive in history, and (b) will see much of the money spent on ‘micro-targeting,’ the use of online data to tailor – pun intended – advertising messages to individuals based on the identification of recipients’ personal vulnerabilities and interests. In order to target effectively, data is essential. And Taylor’s got lots and lots of it, and on a demographic that is exactly what the Biden team needs the most: disproportionally female, young, and passionate. With truly the touch of a button Taylor Swift is uniquely situated to use the data at her disposal to impact the presidential race.”

Leave it to your nerdy consultant to ask: Are WE using OUR listener data to OUR benefit?

Bigger-picture issues:

– Privacy: We have all volunteered LOTS of information about ourselves. Look what pops up in your email and your social media.
– Vulnerability of the Electoral vote process: The last two Republican presidents took office after losing the popular vote. Taylor Swift is my coastal Rhode Island neighbor, and if she votes here, neither of us matter. Our state has four electoral votes. Just 40 thousand-some popular votes in three key states gave Biden his 2020 win.
– Tone: The measurable appeal of Swift’s sunny disposition vs. “I am your retribution.”

Good for us. News/talk radio is in the suspense business. “What JUST happened??? What happens NEXT???” So, we should wish Nikki Haley well.

Inquisitive Smerconish sounds like dispassionate Mr. Spock: “What [Swift detractors on the right] should be worried about is her data.”

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Baseball Station? Own It!

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant 

imAs The Beatles sang, “It’s been a long, cold, lonely winter.” ‘Still is, eh?

Baseball – even Spring Training while it’s still chilly in March – says “Here Comes The Sun.” That’s what baseball means…to listeners. But with games also on SiriusXM and Tune-In and team apps, baseball isn’t the exclusive franchise AM/FM affiliates used to enjoy. So, BE KNOWN for having the games.

im

To local advertisers? In the words of one GM – who has made a pile of money selling baseball – “It’s ego and envy.” And while second and third-generation retailers might family-feud about other things, grandfather AND father AND son can agree on this expenditure lots quicker than you can get consensus about a ROS spot package on Kiss or Lite or Magic or Froggy.

Help yourself to your February Baseball To-Do List: http://getonthenet.com/BaseballFebruary.pdf

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Are Your Weekend Promos Upside-down?

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imAvoid THE most-common mistake I hear in promos for talk stations’ weekend ask-the-expert shows: Opening with the Close.

I coach attorneys/real estate agents/personal finance advisors and other pay-for-play weekend hosts, both on-behalf of client stations, and working directly with these professionals in other markets. Done right, these shows ROI like crazy… but too often they’re well-kept secrets. So, it’s important that weekday promos invite weekend tune-in.

Tip: DON’T begin the promo with the host introducing him/herself and naming the show and when it airs. Instead: Like good commercial copy, the Close (asking for tune-in in this case) comes at the end of the promo.

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Open by stating the listener issues that tuning-in can help inform. Examples:

Attorney: “Have you been injured? Before you accept the insurance company’s offer…”

Real estate agent: “Are you shopping for your first home? Or downsizing?”

Money-talk host: “Is there too much month left at-the-end-of the money?”

Note The Two Magic Words: “you” and “your.”

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio” and “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke and connect on LinkedIn.

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Plan Now for Your Bonus Day

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imTake a day off. You get one free this year.

Programmers: When was the last time you really listened?

— Not the way you usually hear it, at low volume in the office…but “out there,” where/when/how listeners hear radio. Schedule dedicated listening time, away from the station. I promise you will find it an ear-opening experience.

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— In 2024, you have no excuse NOT to take a day to listen…because it’s a Leap Year. You get an extra day, a February 29, courtesy of Pope Gregory XIII, in 1582 (as in “The Gregorian Calendar”). So, heaven help you if you miss this opportunity.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke

Industry Views

Monday Memo: Hello from Las Vegas!

By TALKERS | by TALKERS

By Holland Cooke
Consultant

imThis week, more than a hundred thousand inventors, investors, and techy-nerds from over 150 countries swarm Sin City for CES2024. You’ll be seeing all about it all this week on network newscasts and cable news channels and social media.

And yes, there are square miles of products being introduced here, the “Consumer Electronics” that were the roots of this event. But the big buzz this year will be Artificial Intelligence, at which we-the-legacy-media are looking at over our shoulder, as ChatGPT et al and text-to-speech are augmenting – in some cases displacing – human radio and television talent.

im

After we’ve spent decades learning how to use his software – Bill Gates tells Inc. magazine that – soon – we won’t need to. He describes your “agent,” your A.I. assistant, a constant companion, in your earbud, that has what Gates calls “a rich understanding of your life.” Think Alexa or Siri…on steroids.

Want to send an email? Just start talking. You’ll never miss a birthday, and you’ll know about flight delays and weather and traffic tangles without checking. And YOUR agent will know your FRIENDS’ agents. Even Gates admits that these virtual social secretaries could faux pas: “Suppose you want to see a friend. If YOUR agent talks to THEIRS, you DON’T want it to say, ‘she’s seeing other friends Tuesday and you’re not included.’” Oops.

Sure, it’s gadget heaven here. And some of these TVs are so big that I can’t figure out how they’d get through the door at home. But, year after year lately, services upstage things at CES. This year’s keynoters include the CEO of L’Oréal and Hyundai and Best Buy and Walmart and executives from McDonalds and Northwestern Mutual and Walmart, as technology changes almost every aspect of life every day.

How big is CES? Even the sprawling Las Vegas Convention Center isn’t big-enough. There will be exhibits and sessions up and down The Strip, so I’ll be getting-in my steps. And I’m reporting for TALKERS readers, every day this week. Help yourself to today’s report here: http://getonthenet.com/CES2024-Monday.mp3. It can air until Friday. And I’ll be posting daily 60-second reports you can download at HollandCooke.com.

Holland Cooke (HollandCooke.com) is a consultant working at the intersection of broadcasting and the Internet. He is the author of “Close Like Crazy: Local Direct Leads, Pitches & Specs That Earned the Benjamins” and “Confidential: Negotiation Checklist for Weekend Talk Radio.” Follow HC on Twitter @HollandCooke